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0pt">(根据文字内容整理)
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mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">2014" i0 ^" ~ `# O( ^. I4 ?. v1 |mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">年8月12日
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">地点:3 w- Q- [( y' J7 O4 v0 Bmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">老秘网“文稿修改演播室”(QQ群号:366351120)
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. F- y; y) C' Z8 Z2 K楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">主讲:: P4 ]) s' ?3 u) Tmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方
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E! r/ Y3 B$ ~. M楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">整理:/ N6 n# b+ m+ T/ \9 ^% Emso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">杨苏
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& D3 J: x+ }) b3 X( y# J" L楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">具体内容:
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">一、对一篇汇报材料的讨论
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line-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">/ `4 u, w# q; |7 c% E) ^! kfont-family:黑体;mso-hansi-font-family:黑体;mso-bidi-font-family:黑体">老猫:某市美丽乡村创建工作情况汇报,大家帮某同学推敲一组标题,如何?
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"Times New Roman"">(一)立足转型强村,打造宜业乡村。
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( W) Z0 P! D* N/ ?5 n3 Wline-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">* L2 k7 [# a% S0 k2 X, x"Times New Roman"">(二)坚持“五水共治”,打造宜人乡村
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/ a. I! s; `. Xmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">魅力乡村,幸福乡村、宜居乡村、富裕乡村之类的,我的意思是用一根线串起来,让这组小标题形成一个整体。# G, a, R, B. Y. J. e) Ymso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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{. q1 T w a楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方:3 d0 R( D: {* M6 B; f: y1 mmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">标题分两部分,前半部分亮手段(做法),后半部分凸显成效。四个乡村的思路不错,但内容上缺少支撑,建议再从内容上面抓取下逻辑。另外,感觉题目不足以体现内容。) q+ c) A9 D( E8 i" e4 ? a b
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. w' p4 ?% C; k( ]. @楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">胡晓斌:% y. C! f6 k* w) U6 J
mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯,内容来讲有并列的,也有逻辑递进关系,不知如何把握。6 v. R0 Z! c [% I/ T1 imso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">猫老:4 O0 A. Z0 u1 G# q4 {/ P2 x" z
mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">富增收入,美展新颜。& v7 V" u! H1 w1 t4 z4 p" R
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+ Q- \! o7 g3 a( A; {) ]+ [9 }楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">霞光:5 r5 x+ u9 f) f, Wmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">民生保障作为出发点,惠农增收作为增长点呢$ H+ c" f$ E Q7 ^. Y4 U) e' k, Tmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">,* n4 B5 v/ g7 W6 g/ {- {" j
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+ y" G9 t7 c9 u. L$ b9 a宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">妥否- h# U# W$ h5 y7 t% v. ~mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">?
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">杨苏:' W" s3 w \4 H0 | Emso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">感觉民生保障包括很多方面,不只是宜居。宜居一般是和生态环境放在一起的,民生保障一般和和谐、幸福搭配在一起。 J* o& `3 h3 {6 y" T1 x7 Jmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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% I0 ]4 B) f' C8 Y8 V' U3 ~; a6 L% rline-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">! o0 k$ Q' q' [" \+ j+ ^) s宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">一、三任书记接力干,一张蓝图抓创建; @- E# [" x, y+ i
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宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、政策支撑强保障。# c9 j# i2 `- h8 v0 s仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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# j, s! L' E5 w. N宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、健全机制促落实。 a. L# ?. z+ c# @# e
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宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">二、十年时间抓整治,美丽乡村显成效0 e0 \2 L% F# \) L( i
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">“$ B8 i, C# j9 [* S
mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">重头戏9 c* V, o I# \7 _/ ~$ h& M8 \' [font-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;
9 y$ Y8 R, L9 c' f, Wmso-font-kerning:0pt">”( @" j2 Z* _+ U# \1 x+ X0 lmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">,乡村发展水平有效提升。6 S3 M) f" c# d# l! v. Yfont-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;) v' c8 w" X/ ?; ?1 h3 G
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宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、依靠主体强动力。+ x" c- y# ~& r$ \6 Z4 v4 _font-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;) B) M8 d8 R) ^/ F
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仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt"> 2! y3 s1 Q+ a; ]7 \1 T宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、产村联动促增收。$ H& t p+ j# a4 yfont-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;
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9 W5 D- c( \( X n宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">个村联合建立五星社区,集聚人口+ `0 B( T2 E" v4 J, G% ]8 @mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">25009 S4 i% ?# ~( ^0 \$ Smso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">多人,盘活建设用地% s( D4 G( s6 E8 n
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8 K$ ^1 ? M* @+ e/ t& j宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">万平方米,建设城西物流中心,实现村民、企业、环境的" I$ e- Q" k/ ~2 K
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">用是可以用,问题不在这里。这个材料感觉像是工作总结,挂了个美丽乡村的头,较牵强。& R( L% ^" B; d4 Y) C8 M# ?% N( O, hmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">那没有,美丽乡村建设也包括这些内容的,而不仅仅是村庄整治。! ^- ]/ j: {4 q, D" t9 |mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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, d$ v: g: H% l% W) f' d楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方:6 `% n( ?. k, N- z7 X
mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我不是这个意思,美丽乡村汇报也好,生态乡村汇报也好,这些内容都可以用。一个汇报材料第一是基本情况,第二是对于创建活动本身的相关情况汇报,第三是做法,第四适当点点问题。当然,问题也可以根据实际情况不点。至于你的措施,应该是结合本情况来的。而且此提纲里,做法没有必要分这么多层次,容易造成逻辑上的混乱。你先要明确出这么几个重点。比如,要说转型,你想表达的转型是什么转型,怎么转型,转出什么成效,结合美丽乡村落到优化产业结构上比较好。 b/ d+ @- u! ?7 s0 U2 w+ g* @1 G3 cmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">胡晓斌:+ D4 E8 g* v( `1 |mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我内容太多了是嘛?8 A; y1 i D7 d7 S
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">层次可以简化,什么都想说,太杂了。( ~# U+ K$ G# L) x% n4 emso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">不过不是不能说,要理顺一下。举个例子来说,就用猫总凝练的题目(一)坚持把转型强村作为美丽乡村建设的, v* ?+ R" J3 {" \" smso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“" w5 H$ j5 }8 B# q2 `8 r
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宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">,乡村发展水平有效提升。这个标题要写,要明确围绕的中心是转型强村。效果是乡村发展水平。对应转型强村找内容。 `2 ^8 ]0 n* O! H( W
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">那我把内容归纳一下,第二部分就点明五六点重点内容。6 t0 @0 p: S) u' Z! j% E9 \7 q; Rmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">内容不在于多少,要说出亮点与特色。大家都在创建,为什么选你。因为你创建的有成效,亮点多,做法新。) ]2 m4 y. ~9 t1 y; `$ Zmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这也有点像二元标题。: p9 {6 {+ J5 _" ~! x' ^0 [, qmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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" S: u6 _7 o t) ^: p wmso-font-kerning:0pt">号同学你这是典型的观点加事迹的写法,要把材料融会贯通,并从中提炼观点。# O1 d: q l! i r/ kmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我发表一下个人的想法,有以下几个方面的建议:一是老秘并不了解学员工作的具体环境和具体情况,如果要这样一对一的修改,是需要花费一些时间慢慢对接的;二是就本文来说存在一些逻辑问题,可能是在撰稿之初就犯了一些逻辑性错误,观点(小标题)是根据内容提炼出来的,而本文的小标题对仗工整,乍一看给人的感觉是比较好,但一看内容就有点文不对题了。例如:第一部分,作为乡级政府谈何政策支持?乡镇有制定政策的权限吗?1 m2 d1 q" R: R3 X: Imso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">县级,包括地市级都没有制定政策的权限,都是贯彻落实上级的政策。此外,从文章的提纲看,二级标题不能囊括内容。; Q9 { y/ w6 A- N5 ~9 n& Hmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">县级市应该有制定本县美丽乡村建设实施意见和考核标准、政策支持等权力的吧。二级标题与子标题脱节。& W: q; U, y& i2 j, |7 z
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">即便乡镇没有制定政策的权限,但也可以出台一些举措,比如以奖代补,纳入考核。这些可以归入政策层面。' u7 X' C5 ?* \! f7 n4 u# Vmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">号同学胡晓斌9 K* G, o/ | mmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">——剖析材料的写法。; A/ ^1 n/ W) x5 f: [$ K* w
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这篇六大点,有点多,整合下。: Q3 Y. w2 ^. _0 T% xmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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4 r: P. U: d7 `1 N ^, i楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方:6 j& J2 c- ~$ w. {& X& Rmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">在刚才讨论的基础上,我想谈一谈关于列提纲的一点体会。我所理解的提纲就是动笔之前想好的内容,材料的骨架,也是我们通常所说的谋篇布局。& | _8 m7 b6 Z' i' Dmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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5 U2 P0 @6 y- ^7 r4 X楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">铁树凝:需求为王,刨树刨根,循此,深挖,梳理片段,轮廓,佐以素材,碰撞,修正思路,揉融观点素材,思路为纲,纲举目张,终是符合有关要求,才算好。
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) D% D" O* }# L0 x5 f/ F楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">飘雪:总之写作很难,难在何处,之一是思维。
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">铁树凝:难在先方有可贵后生!思路素材之间有一碰撞修正过程不是一成不变的,中间很多时候有变化。
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8 t6 c; |' w5 x" b9 E/ M楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">老猫:好标题的灵感从哪里来?老猫的体会是从段落内容中提炼,从个别字词中联想,从上级文件中生发,从参考资料中化用,从交流碰撞中偶得。